All I Want For Christmas Is….

What everyone else (really) wants

As per my tradition at this time of year, I watched ‘Love Actually’ – and yes, I cried again. What can I say? I’m a sucker for romance, and no, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. For me, the movie encapsulates the many facets of Love, from the mundane to the sublime, from the pain of betrayal and abandonment to the sheer euphoria of finding that special someone. And, for whatever reason, it means more when it happens at Christmas.

Apart from being about Love in all its dimensions, it highlights the significance of people – the ones in your life, the ones who have left or are absent, and the ones you have yet to meet. When all is said and done, those two elements are what make Life worthwhile and give it meaning: Love and People. And we tend to forget that.

I find it interesting that I hear the same comments every year at Christmas about how stressful it is, how materialistic it is, how it’s lost its meaning, and how expensive it is. I fear too many of us have fallen into the ‘can’t-wait-for-this-to-be-over’ brigade. To be fair, it feels at times that the frenetic December energy is purposely pulling us away from the opportunity to enjoy and appreciate the people in our lives, let alone acknowledge the presence of Love. And more’s the pity, I say.

Despite the chaos, stress and commercialization of Christmas, it doesn’t prevent us from bringing a little Love into our consciousness and to those around us. It really is up to us to make Christmas what we want it to be, as an expression of our hearts rather than succumbing to the cynicism that is all too common. For me it’s about the renewal of hope and the death of what no longer serves us.

Hope is about daring to dream and to feel in your bones that you deserve to have your dreams come true. Ironically, that requires you to let go of and let die all the ways you are standing in your own way. It’s a rude shock when you realise that your own thoughts and behaviours are sabotaging your happiness – which seems nonsensical and little crazy at first. But one day you wake up and it hits you right between the eyes – what was hidden comes into focus, the unconscious become conscious. Enter the existential crisis where you undertake the monumental task of reinventing yourself which, incidentally, is all about death and renewal.

But I digress…

Perhaps as you read this newsletter, you will pause for a few minutes to revisit all that has transpired for you in 2024. As you reflect, you may come to realise that Love and People are the common denominator in all your experiences. It is through our relationships that we find meaning and a deeper understanding of ourselves. Our relationships are a mirror, they reflect back to us who we are, who we are not and who we aspire to be. It is where we find qualities we admire that perhaps we haven’t accepted within ourselves. It is also where we find qualities we reject that perhaps we haven’t accepted and healed within ourselves.

No matter who you are, I have no doubt there have been significant events throughout 2024 that have touched your heart and left their mark in some way. Good or bad, they are the stuff of Life, the delights and distresses that punctuate our existence and can expand our soul if we allow ourselves that privilege with a touch of grace.

There will be particular experiences that stand out above others, evoking strong emotions even now: tears, laughter, joy, grief, everything from annoyance to bliss, heartbreak to ecstasy, sometimes within the same hour and sometimes with the same people. With a little time and distance we can appreciate the gift within these experiences. It’s not always pretty but it’s always the precursor to our inner wisdom - the wisdom to know what to hold on to and what to let go.

I think Christmas is the perfect time to contemplate what is meaningful, precious and important to you. I suspect it will mostly be about Love and People. Underneath all the complaining and whining, that is all we want and that is really all that matters.

So, my beautiful subscribers, I would like to take this opportunity to thank you for reading my musings and for accompanying me on this journey. I feel truly honoured and grateful for your presence in this space. Some of you I know, others I have met and, who knows, if the stars align, I may yet meet some of you.

From my heart to yours I wish you a blessed Christmas, however you choose to commemorate the occasion. Most of all I wish you ‘Love Actually.’